


hit or miss

by loveline (yerim)



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Baseball, Crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-10-09 19:27:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17412833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yerim/pseuds/loveline
Summary: When Mingyu was a little boy, his father gave him some important advice.This is the story of how Mingyu joined baseball.





	hit or miss

**Author's Note:**

> i can't believe i'm making my ao3 debut with a _crack fic_.
> 
> here's the story: i wrote this in june 2017 on my sister's google drive account (for some reason). it was lost forever until today when my sister sent me a screenshot of this masterpiece.
> 
> i decided the world needed to see it, so here it is.

When Mingyu was a little boy, his father gave him some important advice. One day, while Mingyu was preparing for bed, his father sat him down on his knee and made an important decision for him.

  


__

_Sometime in April, 2002_

__  


  


_ “Son, being a man is not just about strength. It’s about using the strength that you have for something productive.”  _

  


_ Mingyu doesn’t have much strength, but he nods anyway. “How do I become... productive, Dad?”  _

  


_ “I think that you should channel your energy into a sport, Mingyu-yah.” Mingyu’s eyes widen. He doesn’t know what a sport is, but he nods anyway. _

  


_ “I’d much rather you hit balls and not hit on girls, son.” Mingyu doesn’t know what a girl is, but he nods anyway.  _

  


And that’s how Mingyu joined baseball.

  


May 2017

  


“Ow, Wonwoo, what the  _ fuck _ .” Jihoon snarls at Wonwoo, whose terrible pitch has just hit him in the leg for like the tenth time today. 

  


Wonwoo is the worst pitcher in the history of the world. Jihoon is the angriest catcher in the history of the world. If Wonwoo messes up one more time, Jihoon is gonna break a wooden bat over his head. Mingyu shudders thinking about it, reminiscing about Summer 2k12. Good times.

  


Their makeshift baseball team consists of Mingyu and eleven other losers who somehow grouped together to form this monstrosity. Mingyu recruited most of them: Wonwoo and Jihoon (blackmail); Dokyeom (one chicken leg with sauce); Junhui, Seungcheol and Chan (they honestly wanted to play); Jeonghan (some good-hearted flirting and five dollars); and Soonyoung (a carefully placed kick to the inner thigh). 

  


A couple of them joined of their own accord. Mingyu honestly has no idea. Seungkwan and Vernon joined so they could convince their parents they could do something with their lives other than fuck around in Vernon’s basement. They don’t contribute much to the team, but they are  _ great  _ outfield players, and Vernon came up with some pretty solid rhymes that they throw at their opponents. 

  


As for Minghao, everyone thinks he walked into the room completely lost and decided to join the team. They’re all great friends though, it’s all cool. They have fun, it’s all good.

  


They named themselves the Carrots, because the only color uniform that Dick’s still had in bulk was orange. 

  


As for their overall athletic ability……. 

  


Jihoon has both quick legs and a quick mouth. He’s such a small dude; there’s no way that much anger can fit in his little brain. That’s why he has to release it on others every four seconds, Mingyu thinks. There’s an upside to this, though. When he gets mad, he fuckin destroys the other team. Bonus!

  


Seungcheol is the first baseman, and Chan the shortstop. They actually  _ want  _ to be here. Bonus!

  


Mingyu has the coordination of a blind squirrel trying to jump from tree to tree. His legs aren’t even connected to his body at this point. He plays third base.

  


As for the rest, he doesn’t even know what positions they play. It doesn’t matter much to Mingyu. 

  


Today they play some random team from Busan. Their pitcher is kind of hot. Mingyu tried to flirt with him once, and that’s how he got that cool scar on his thigh. The pitcher’s reaction hurt his feelings then (and his legs, damn those metal cleats), but it’s a funny story to tell now. It makes him feel tough.

  


“You’re not tough! You cried for _ three days _ after that incident,” Jihoon would say.  

  


Jihoon doesn’t know anything. He’s a stupid little man who’s never had a girlfriend and has to buy children’s size shoes. 

  


Mingyu swerves into the other lane, and that’s when he realizes that he’s driving a van with eleven weak baseball players in the backseat. Junhui throws a baseball at him. It hits the windshield and cracks it.

  


“Ha, you missed!” Chan shouts. 

  


“Thank God he’s not the pitcher,” Jeonghan mutters.

  


“I’m turning this car around!” Mingyu screams at them, only because he loves to say that. 

  


They approach the baseball field and begin to warm up. Joshua Hong is already sitting on the away team’s bleachers, holding a glass water bottle filled with fruit. He waves to Mingyu.

  


Joshua is their cheerleader. He just randomly began showing up to their games. Nobody on the team even knows him. He used to bring them cupcakes after every game, but then he started spending too much time on Tumblr. Now he’s gluten free, vegan, lactose free, and he’s always going on and on about kale. He drinks these weird teas that look like lake water.

  


When Mingyu asked him about it, he looked at him seriously and said, “Two words. De-tox.” 

  


Mingyu doesn’t know what  _ de-tox _ is, but he nods anyway. 

**Author's Note:**

> if you made it to the end: congratulations! you're finished! unlike this fic
> 
> i promise this isn't how i actually write.. not when i'm being serious
> 
> i still don't understand why i wrote this. i think it's better not to know.


End file.
